Medicinal Conspiracy

I experienced the most disturbing bodily function humanly possible last night!

As I was slowing down for the night and getting ready for bed I gathered my 9 pills that I am required to take. I grabbed a large glass of water and headed to the computer to look up a few wedding things before going to bed and proceeded to ingest my prescriptive poison.

After taking eight of my nine pills I saw the light at the other end of the tunnel (can you tell I don't enjoy taking pills?!). With my last pill I very successfully caused a road block by lodging it in my throat. I drank the rest of my water trying to coax the little guy to loosen his grip and fall with his brothers and sisters into the acidic pit that would inevitably become his fate. My efforts were in vain for he would not falter.

I continued playing on the computer and ignoring the little lump in my throat that was inhibiting the ability to swallow, be comfortable and think clearly. After a few minutes of this I felt a bubble of air welling up inside of me.

My burp charged up my throat as if on a mission. When it reached just the right location, the little capsule around the pill, that was so desperately holding on, simultaneously melted. The result of this catastrophic coincidence was a very large burst of powder spraying into my mouth.

I immediately gagged, threw up in my mouth, swallowed by reflex and then ran to the kitchen to get some more water.

Moral of the story... do not take any form of pills ever for they are conspiring to ruin all forms of enjoyment and relaxation!